Reason #1,235 that I am not ready to have babies

I want to be able to go to a wine tasting class then drink margaritas and eat copious amounts of chips and salsa at a local Mexican restaurant where it just so happens to be karaoke night. All on a Wednesday after work. There’s no room for babies in that scenario. There’s barely room for a full grown toy fox terrier. (Gatsby was not happy that we left him alone for so long, as evidenced by the explosion of hyperactivity that met us at the door when we got home).

Let’s just say that if it’s wrong to find it hilarious that through some weird misunderstanding, my friend Erin accidentally led the host of karaoke night to believe that she was a scout from EMI talent agency, then I don’t want to be right. There’s something beautiful about the sparkle of hope in a small Asian man’s eyes when he believes that maybe his big break has finally come.

Witnessing a college frat boy methodically recite all of the lyrics to The Bloodhound Gang’s “Ain’t Nothing But Mammals” is the kind of experience I am not yet willing to give up. If anyone deserves to be discovered, it’s that guy – I was beyond impressed.

And then there was Don. Adorable, scruffy, Vietnam vet Don who sang several country songs about stars and stripes. And also Neil Sedaka’s Calendar Girl. His wife, when she wasn’t trying to get his attention by barking “God Damn it, Don!” could be found dancing in the back of the room with one of college frat boy’s friends.

God Bless America.

And birth control.

2 thoughts on “Reason #1,235 that I am not ready to have babies

  1. AGREED.
    My after work happy hours, that turn into dinner and drinks, followed by some late night partying are the only thing keeping me sane (and happy) these days. I know my dog isn’t a big fan, but he gets to snuggle with me in bed when I come home (you know, for the whole 4-5 hours of sleep that follow…).
    Great post!

  2. In my defense, my bf is way worse than I am about this whole gum thing. Everytime we go to a restaurant he puts his gum on the side of the plate. I stopped doing that a long time ago….though apparently I am ok with putting it on the side of cups. The funny thing is I totally had a pack of gum in my purse.

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